she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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