I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize