He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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