If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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