i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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