two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
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