Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
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get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
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I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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