what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
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