Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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