Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
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I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
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Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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