youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize