Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize