Hey man sorry I got all grabby
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize