Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
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