Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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