im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize