im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize