last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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