tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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