you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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