I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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