great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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