yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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