is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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