Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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