Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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