is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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