How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize