So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
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She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
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Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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