Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
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This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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