the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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