girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
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Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
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We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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