Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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