i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Someone signed my nipple.
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