last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
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