waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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