I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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