Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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