Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
two words: eviction party
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize