You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
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