He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
we're so committed to being not committed
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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