So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize