If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize