I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Pants 0. Shit 1.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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