Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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