we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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