now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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