also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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