we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
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I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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