ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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